A Baby, a Good Bye and a Ring

An emotional rollercoaster... That was the 36 hour period between noon on March 30th and midnight on March 31st.  Let me go back for a second... A couple of weeks ago, my mom emailed me and told me that my grandpap (my dad's dad) had gone into hospice care at his home.  He was having heart failure and it was unclear how much longer he was going to hold on.  My older brother came to my sad, homesick heart's rescue (awww) and offered to use his air miles to fly me home to say good-bye to Grandpap.  All signs pointed to "go home for a visit"... I was at a site that I love but they had just informed me that they had a ten day vacation starting the following week.  That meant that either I would sit around and do nothing (which I hate) or I would go back to kmg and see if there are any kids to evaluate... this would have been ok but since I was not scheduled to be there and many of the families come from the villages, they may not have had much for me to do given the late notice.   I also needed to make one more visa run.  My plan was to take the night bus to Vietnam because it's cheap but I had just read some blogs about it and I was nervous.  Apparently, most people get mugged.  Also, I have heard that it is true that people get sliced up for their internal organs.  There is a black market for kidneys and livers so the gangs tend to target young women... I was told that my organs are too old but it still sounds terrifying!  Buses within Chn seem to be safe but the ones going into bordering counties sound scary.  Sooo that left me with a decision... do I risk the night bus and forever regret it if I get a kidney stolen or spend the extra cash on a flight?  Luckily, my brother's offer to fly me home came before my cheapness got the best of my internal organs : ).  John and I talked and decided that I would come home for two weeks and that I would surprise the rest of my family...  Now you are caught up to March 30th.  

On Sunday, I went over and surprised my grandma and grandpap : ).  Gram was happy to see me : )  My grandpap had dementia during the last two years (?) of his life so while he didn't really remember who I was, he was happy to chat me up anyway!  He was up and talking and looked about how he looked when I left for Chn.  This is also when I met my handsome nephew for the first time.  It was neat to be sitting with the youngest and oldest person that I know in the same room!  After seeing gram and grandpap I went to surprise my immediate family...It just so happened that Sunday evening my family was having a birthday party for my dad and younger sister.  Bill had the genius idea that I skype them (I have skyped into other family functions) and while Im talking to them on skype, run into the house.  So that's what I did and it was hysterical : ).

NOW TO THE GOOD STUFF... THE ENGAGEMENT!

Bill took off of work on Monday so we could spend the day together.  We decided to go up to Ligonier to see the location that we are going to get married at.  Bill has seen the venue, but since I have been in China, I haven't.   There, at the site of our wedding in 193 days Bill asked me to marry him.  I'm crying as I type this because it was the sweetest moment of my life : )  The proposal was so Bill and I... He had the ring in his pocket and was trying to find the right moment to pop the question... I was running around planning and he couldn't get me to stand still long enough to get the words out of his mouth.  Finally, as I was running around talking out tealights, Bill told me to stop moving around and stand with him for a minute.  The next part also makes me smile... as we were talking about the wedding ceremony, he asked which hand he would someday put a ring on and I gave him the wrong hand... Anyone that has know me for a long time knows that I have ALWAYS had a hard time with knowing my left from my right : )  After getting the correct hand, he got down on one knee and asked me to marry him and I screamed!  I've had a good life and have so many things to be joyful about, but that was the most joyful moment I've ever had : )  Although I knew that the formal proposal was coming at some point, I was still really surprised!  Looking back I see that on Sunday and Monday, Bill was extra smirky and I kept asking him what he was smirking about, he claimed that he was just happy to see me.  Well I guess the ring in his pocket was the true reason for his extra smirkyness : )   After spending some time together in Ligonier, Bill and I stopped by my older brother and sister-in-laws house to show off the ring (it's amazing ;) ).  

After talking to them for awhile we heard that grandpap wasn't doing well so we drove to grams.  I said good-bye to grandpap that night.  He didn't pass aways until early Tuesday morning but that was the last time I saw him and he wasn't doing well.  People probably wonder if that put a cloud over the day and while I would have liked to never have grandpap pass away, I feel like I saw something sweet that maybe wouldn't have resignated as much with me if it weren't the day of my engagement... I watched my grandma love her husband of 71 years until the very end.   Grandpap went straight from grandma's arm's to J3sus.  I don't even want to think about ever losing Bill, but when that day comes, i want to be the kind of wife that sticks with him until he breaths his last breath.   

Could more life moments happen within a shorter period of time?  That day I witnessed life's bests loves... I saw the parental love that my brother and sister- in-law have for their new son, the seasoned love that my grandparents have after years of marriage and the joyful young love that Bill and I have for each other.  Within minutes of one another I was holding my one month old nephew followed by holding the hand of my 96 year old dying grandpap followed by holding the hand of my future husband.  It was a day where joy and grief mixed but somehow the grief didn't steal the joy.  And more miraculously still, I was able to see that even in death there is joy because it gives us the chance to celebrate my grandpap's long life and look forward to seeing him Heaven side.

I love you grandpap... You will be missed : (. 

I love you Bill and pray that we get AT LEAST 71 years of marital bliss  ; )