Why G0d?

This is one of those posts that I want to write because through writing I gain clarity... it orders my chaotic thoughts into something bite size, organized and manageable.  But I don't know where to begin on this one...

I'll begin with this... its been a hard week for reasons that I can't discuss now, but I'll say that we live in a sad world that doesn't make sense.  Sometimes it feels like the weak and the innocent suffer while the evil ones get their way.  These sort of weeks always bring the theological question that I can't quite come to terms with... Why does G0d let it happen?  This leads down another path of wondering who G0d really is.  In the past when I tried to process this question, it inevitably led to confusion, disappointment and/or anger.  Confusion because I can't understand why an all powerful G0d wouldn't intervene on behalf of the innocent. Disappointment because I want to believe in a G0d that fights the bad guys... I want Him to save people from suffering.  Anger because if I believe that He can intervene and doesn't, then how can He be as loving as He says.  In the past I've come to the conclusion that I only have two choices....I can believe in a loving G0d who has no power or I can believe in an all powerful G0d who lacks love.  Neither seems correct, comforting or logical.  

In an effort to figure life out, I started reading Philip Yancey's latest book called "The Question That Never Goes Away."  Good book.   In this book he was asked to visit the site of three recent tragedies, Japan (tsunami), Sarajevo and Newtown Connecticut and speak about where G0d is in our pain.  I'm glad I don't have his job.  He makes numerous good points in his book.  I'm not sure that they totally answer, or more truthfully, they don't give me the answer that I want to this question, but its a start.  What I want to happen is for G0d to give us free will but save us when our free will gets us into trouble.  That just doesn't seem to be how it goes. 

So I guess the answer I've come to (right or wrong) is this.... yes, G0d is good.  I've seen too much goodness around me to be able to deny that fact.  Some of the good things I've seen don't make sense other than the fact that they are G0d's goodness.  Part of His goodness is that He makes us free.  I love freedom... I hate being confined or restricted.  There are those times in your life where your own freedom overwhelms you with pure joy... I remember when I was 17, my cousin and I snuck away to the beach for a couple of days (My mom and dad didn't find out at the time, but I think I told them years later?  If not. here's my confession!).  We slept in a car in the Walmart parking lot... it wasn't a luxury vacation but I remember the elation in my heart as I stood on the beach as a 17 year old and though "I'm free."   I get this rush every time I travel, every time I go on a road trip and on the last day of school (both as a kid and as an employee!).  I love being free!  I'm reading 1984 right now and the thought of having my freedom taken, whether it be by humans or by a deity, isn't enticing.  We (as the Human race), have the freedom to make this world what we want it to be.  I believe that most of us, most of the time, use our free will to make our world amazing.  We are creative, fun, loving and hardworking, all of which result in a world filled with beauty.  But we (as the Human race) also have a dark side.  It's this side that we see when we see horrific things like war, starvation, abuse, etc.  I guess that's as good as I'll get in this lifetime at understanding why bad happens.  

  

In the conclusion of his book, Yancey gives three answers to the question, "Where is God?" 

1.  Emmanuel... G0d with us.   Christmas and Easter... G0d could have solved the problem of humanity in a lot of different ways but He choose to send J3sus to us on Christmas.  Then Easter came...He didn't prevent suffering on Good Friday but He redeemed the bad and made it good on Sunday.  The life of J3sus proves that G0d understands human suffering because He has experienced it.  It also proves His power, while He didn't prevent the suffering (crucifixion), He overcame it in the resurrection.  

2.  In the Chrch (Chrch doesn't mean the building... it means it's people).   I've cried a lot the past couple of days because I want answers and I want solutions... My tears aren't tears of the victim because I'm not the victim... I'm the seemingly helpless bystander.  I want to save people that I don't have power to save and lift them out of situations that I can't lift them out of.  One of the quotes in the book is this, "We in the chrch have work to do.  Some have particular gifts: counseling, medical assistance, building houses, other practical ways of helping.  All of us have love.  Suffering isolates, batters self-image, ravages hope; a loving presence can prevail over all three."  Earlier in the book, Yancey points out that while we don't have an answer for "why" bad things happen, we can positively respond in two ways... we can find meaning in the suffering and we can come to help those in need.  

3.  G0d is preparing a new home for us.  Another encouraging quote "Two thousand years later, we live out our days as if on Holy Saturday, the in-between day.  We look back on Good Friday and its clear sign that no suffering is irredeemable; we look ahead with unrequited longing for a creation made new.  Suspended in the meantime, we get not a remedy for suffering but a use for it, a pattern of meaning."

In closing, I felt like this quote summed it up (last quote, at what point does Philip Yancey sue me for reproducing his book : ) ) "God entered the drama of human history as one of it's characters, not with a display of omnipotence but in a most intimate and vulnerable way.  On a small scale, person to person, J3sus encountered the kinds of suffering common to all of us.  And how did He respond?  Avoiding philosophical theories and theological lessons, He reached out with healing and compassion.  He forgave sin, healed the afflicted, cast out evil, and even overcame death.  From His brief time on earth, we gain not only a bright and shining clue to the future but also a clear example of how we his followers should respond to those who suffer."